While reading a graduation speech at some point, I remember a story shared by a Chinese girl who, like me, immigrated to the U.S. She mentioned how her parents would tell her she was a disgrace to China whenever she struggled academically, and that motivated her to push herself and become strong enough to succeed here. If I recall correctly, she probably went to medical school, and given her graduation speech, she must have studied extraordinarily hard.

The phrase “disgrace to China” isn’t all that foreign to me. Korean kids who immigrated to the U.S., like me, have likely been motivated by their parents with similar phrases like “disgrace to Korea” while in school. Immigrant parents seem to share a similar mindset…

I don’t have the drive to be my mom’s pride, but I still want to be a son she can be proud of. If I’m not ashamed, I can boast and act confidently, right? So, I set personal standards before I go around showing off.

Of course, this isn’t just about impressing my mom. I don’t know how objective the qualifications I set for myself are, but that’s how I’ve lived. Are those who criticize politicians truly blameless? Are they projecting their own issues onto seemingly easy targets? Although I felt a bit unsettled when Jang Je-won passed away recently—he always spoke so strongly—I wasn’t as affected by Park Won-soon’s passing a few years ago. Humanity is complex. Just because someone claims to fight for justice or the common folk doesn’t mean they’re free from personal impulses. These are separate matters. Some people lead clean private lives and still aren’t great, while others might have messy private lives yet positively influence many people. However, forcing anything is problematic.

I’ve been with my company for 13 years now. I’ve overcome the initial humiliations and unfair treatment to reach my current position. Along the way, there were many people I wanted to strangle, but there were also many to be thankful for. I try not to forget those who showed kindness when I had no power, even when it didn’t benefit them. Of course, I’ve forgotten some, but those who left a mark on me will receive my gratitude until they’re sick of it. However, to express my gratitude to such an extent, I need to be more capable first.

Why did they show me kindness? Maybe they thought I’d repay it, or perhaps they gained something unknown to me, or maybe they were just bored. Regardless, thanks to some of these people, I stayed on the right path and made it here. Although I’m still far from them, I now have people seeking career advice or technical help from me. While not everyone is like I was, I hope there are some among them who share my mindset, and if even one or two out of ten become influential and positive figures in this world, that’s more than enough.

There are two types of people I dislike: those who lie and those who don’t work hard.

Recently, an executive asked me if I disliked someone simply because I chose to dislike them once. Honestly, this executive is one of the few people I’ve met who is considerably smarter than I am, so when he asks such questions, it makes me reevaluate my values. I dislike this person because they lie. Can someone who lies once truly repent and never lie again? I can’t trust that. If their objectives change, they’ll lie again. Sometimes our interests align, but should I work with such a person? I think it’s best to avoid them as much as possible. Whether my approach is right will only be revealed with time. (Actually, I think the executive doesn’t like them either.) Lying is like slapping a daughter; there might be those who’ve never slapped their daughter, but once you start, you can’t just stop at one.

The second is someone who doesn’t work hard. There’s someone recently causing me great distress. They once worked hard. My obsession with them probably stems from my self-doubt in assessing people. I’m likely fixated on my flawed judgment rather than the person themselves. As a result, I’m experiencing significant stress, to the point of feeling a dull ache in my chest. I’ve completely lost trust in this person. As things stand, it might lead to destructive outcomes for myself. However… thinking broadly, I’m becoming too tired of these things. If I can’t resolve this myself and no one can help, imagining a different environment might not be a bad choice. I’ll probably visit a doctor soon for a diagnosis.

Some might say wanting to change my environment over such trivial matters is foolish, but I’ve endured these situations and stayed at one company for a long time. Among the 700+ in our organization, fewer than five have been here longer than I have.

I don’t know if the path I’m heading down is right. But it’s fortunate that there seem to be many opportunities worth investing effort into again. I hear there are many who can’t find work for a year or two after getting laid off. I can’t afford that luxury. Since I probably won’t be let go anytime soon, I’ll work hard at my current job while envisioning other futures.

Honestly, I’m considering just getting married these days… hahaha.

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I don’t particularly like Lee Jae-myung, but there’s much to learn and respect about his life. Seeing how he’s persevered through tough circumstances is truly impressive. People like Hong Joon-pyo and Roh Moo-hyun have faced hardships, but Lee Jae-myung is quite remarkable. Even when I heard about his profane outburst at his sister-in-law, it didn’t make me dislike him. I thought, yes, he could do that. What concerns me is the number of people around him who’ve died, whether by suicide or otherwise. Regardless, it seems South Korea no longer has many situations where people must overcome adversity with sheer determination, like Lee Jae-myung, Hong Joon-pyo, or Roh Moo-hyun. As the country prospers, even someone like me, living abroad, feels a sense of pride.

There’s news that Bibigo applied for a patent on dumpling designs in the U.S., which has China upset. My personal opinion is that patents can be filed. But isn’t it obvious that dumplings are Chinese food? The absurd part is the Korean reaction to China’s outrage. They say, didn’t you try to claim kimchi or taekwondo as your own? However, dumplings are undeniably Chinese. Just hearing the story of Zhuge Liang makes that clear. Honestly, I’m unsure if it’s the right move. Stripping away national colors, the majority of Koreans already eat kimchi made in China. The issue isn’t that it’s made in China, but that it’s made unhygienically and those come from China. Blindly criticizing China… I don’t know if that’s meaningful. China, with its vast economy, engages in protectionism, which is quite petty. However, instead of brazenly responding to China’s disappointment over the dumpling patent, perhaps we could have a conversation acknowledging that we felt similarly when you claimed kimchi as yours. Even if some Chinese view kimchi as their food, how many of them actually eat it? In contrast, while dumplings are widely consumed in Korea, there’s barely anyone in China who doesn’t eat them.

Anyway… can’t politicians and citizens all just get along…? It’s really frustrating haha.